SharePoint, Workflow and Microsoft Search Server

This content is 18 years old. I don't routinely update old blog posts as they are only intended to represent a view at a particular point in time. Please be warned that the information here may be out of date.

Earlier this week, I headed into Microsoft’s offices in London for an evening meeting of the SharePoint User Group UK.  I’m not a SharePoint expert by any stretch of the imagination (I’ve looked at various SharePoint products over the years but have no implementation experience) but I am interested in the product’s development – particularly as it seems to me that it is finally starting to gain some traction with customers.

The first session was a deep dive into developing Workflow with SharePoint and InfoPath, presented by Chris O’Brien.  To be perfectly honest, this went a little too deep into developer concepts for me to follow, but Chris has written about it on his blog for anyone who wants the details.

The second session was presented by Andrew Woodward, who looked at Microsoft Search Server 2008.  I’m particularly interested in this as it’s only a few months since I spent some time learning about implementing enterprise Search using Microsoft Office SharePoint Server (MOSS) 2007 and the replacement of MOSS for Search with Search Server provides many new options for federated search that will be eventually be backported into the main MOSS product (initially via Microsoft Update and then as part of MOSS 2007 service pack 2).  What’s particularly interesting is the positioning of Microsoft Search Server 2008 Express as a free product – meaning that even small businesses can afford to implement SharePoint for enterprise search (and also potentially allowing for the creation of SharePoint appliances, much like the Google Search Appliance).  There’s more about Microsoft’s enterprise search products (including Search Server) on the Microsoft website.

Overall, the evening was interesting (and well attended) – for future events, check out the SharePoint User Group UK website.

Dell customer service fails again

This content is 18 years old. I don't routinely update old blog posts as they are only intended to represent a view at a particular point in time. Please be warned that the information here may be out of date.

A few years back I had the misfortune of using a Dell Latitude D600 notebook computer for my work.  At the time I wrote about the problems I experienced with Dell customer service and it seems that Michael Dell’s return as CEO isn’t doing much to improve the customer experience.

Then, last week, I bought a Dell PowerEdge 840 server.  I did it because it was cheap.  So, one might ask what am I complaining about but, even though £391.98 is very inexpensive for a server, I expect some service when I’m trying to buy something from someone.

I suppose I’m spoilt because normally I buy many servers at a time, have a technical account manager to help me select the right options and it’s someone else’s money if I miss something and need to buy some more components.  Oh yes, and I buy HP servers where possible.  This time I was spending my own money and wanted the best deal possible.

As I worked through Dell’s "build your system" website, I wanted some technical support for the RAID connectivity options which, after telling me that the server supports up to 2 cabled or hot-plug SAS or SATA hard drives, the website listed as:

  • C1B – Motherboard SATA cabled, min 2, max 2 Hard Drives connected to onboard SATA controller.
  • C1C – Motherboard SATA cabled, min 3, max 3 Hard Drives connected to onboard SATA controller.
  • C1D – Motherboard SATA cabled, min 4, max 4 Hard Drives connected to onboard SATA controller.

I was confused.  If the server only supports 2 cabled or hot-plug drives, then why is there a no-cost option to have 3 or 4 hard drives connected to the on-board SATA controller?  So I called Dell.  Only to find after about 8 (no kidding) menu options on the phone system that the "small business" department I needed to speak to was closed and only works from 9 to 4.30 Monday to Friday (part-timers…).

I bought the server anyway because the discount was due to expire (it’s since been extended) and called back on Monday. After making 4 menu selections I got to a person who was somewhere in South Asia and sounded helpful but was clearly following a script.  She redirected me to someone in Ireland who sounded annoyed that I was taking up her time and told me that my query was a technical one (not sales). She put me through to technical support, who were confused when I said that I didn’t have a service tag because my system was still being built but put me through to the PowerEdge department anyway.  They were busy but after 5 minutes on hold I spoke to a person who was helpful but didn’t really fill me with confidence in his advice as first of all, he told me that the PowerEdge 840 supports up to 4 drives (good) but that the options may be for different backplanes.  Then he checked and said that the system supports 2 drives on the motherboard but drives 3 and 4 would need a separate RAID controller.  As that seemed to contradict the options at purchase time and he couldn’t comment on the "build your system" website, I’m still no clearer.

I guess I’ll find out how many drives I can get in this server (and what the C1B/C/D options mean) when it arrives next week…

Googling for information

This content is 18 years old. I don't routinely update old blog posts as they are only intended to represent a view at a particular point in time. Please be warned that the information here may be out of date.

Just before Christmas, someone showed me how to use Google (yes… the search engine) to convert values between units (e.g. kilometres into miles). I didn’t know that feature was there in Google and it turns out there are many more useful search features too – things like the weather forecast, films at the local cinema, etc. (as well as the well known stuff like definitions, inbound links and Google’s cache).

Windows Server 2008 {is coming soon}

This content is 18 years old. I don't routinely update old blog posts as they are only intended to represent a view at a particular point in time. Please be warned that the information here may be out of date.

Windows Server 2008 logoIt’s been a couple of weeks since I posted anything on this blog as I decided to spend Christmas with my family (i.e. not with the computer) and didn’t have any posts ready to publish.  I’ve also been suffering recently from a combination of writer’s block and too much work so, as a consequence, I have many things in my head but very little written down… mostly about Windows Server 2008. As it will be part of a very significant product launch in a few weeks’ time I thought it was about time I updated my previous post looking forward to Windows Server 2008 and highlighted the main advantages of Microsoft’s latest Windows Server release, although I have to confess that much of this is based on Microsoft’s marketing message (with a little of my own opinion for good measure).

A couple of months back, I watched Bill Laing, General Manager for Microsoft’s Windows Server Division, give a keynote presentation to the press on Windows Server 2008 during which he looked back over the history of Windows Server:

  • Windows NT was really a file and print server product with some application support, finally starting to gain acceptance with NT 4.0, which launched in 1996.  In those days, enterprise applications ran on large (typically Unix-based) computers or mainframes and the main competition for departmental deployments was Novell NetWare.
  • Windows 2000 marked a significant change with the introduction of Active Directory and scalability improvements.
  • Even though IIS had existed as a standalone product and then in Windows 2000, Windows Server 2003 was a turning point for Windows application hosting, with Internet Information Services (IIS) 6, 64-bit hardware support, and specialised SKUs (e.g. Windows Storage Server) as well as a web edition of Windows Server.
  • Windows Server 2003 R2 was a midpoint release with new tools for administrators.
  • Windows Server 2008 is a major new update that Microsoft is pitching as a customer focused release.

Bill Laing highlighted a number of hardware inflection points around 64-bit hardware support, multiple processor cores, power consumption and virtualisation.  In addition, he cited customer feedback as the main reason for providing role-based server management, the ability to remove the desktop experience and only run essential server services, and of course the old favourites (or "foundational attributes" as Bill Laing referred to them) – reliability, management and performance.

So, how has Microsoft responded to this famed customer feedback?  They are pitching the major improvements in Windows Server 2008 as follows:

  • your platform {reliable} – looking first at Windows Server as a server platform, Microsoft has provided a solid foundation with:
    • A new management experience.  Server Manager provides a simple point of administration for role-based deployment.  Out of the box, Windows Server 2008 has 17 optional roles (e.g. Active Directory, file, print, web, etc.) and 35 optional features (e.g. multi-path input/output, desktop experience, clustering, etc.).  Windows PowerShell is integrated within the operating system (removing what I consider to be one of the main barriers to adoption of this extremely powerful technology).  Microsoft has also made improvements in the area of power management (now enabled by default) and is working with developers to ensure that applications are written to be more efficient in their use of power (polling vs. quiescing, etc.).
    • Reliability. A new server installation option – Server Core – allows organisations to run servers with only essential Windows services and a limited user interface, supporting selected server roles for command-line (or remote) administration.  There is also a new networking stack, with improved TCP/IP performance and scalability.  Finally, failover clustering (renamed to avoid confusion with other clustering technologies) has been improved from both the implementation perspective and in the provision of support for clusters.
  • web experiences {stunning} – another major change in Windows Server 2008 is IIS 7.  IIS7 uses a modular architecture to improve application performance and aid extensibility.  There are also new IIS management and deployment tools.  This is backed up with new Windows Media services for advanced streaming and caching as well as web application services for communications and workflow integration.
  • infrastructure {virtualised} – whilst other vendors (i.e. VMware) may benefit from their experience of the x86/x64 virtualisation technologies, there is little doubt in my mind that Hyper-V represents a huge step forward for Microsoft.  Furthermore, Microsoft is pitching its virtualisation story as a multi-level approach from the point of view of:
    • Licensing – since Windows Server 2003 R2, Microsoft has adjusted its Windows Server licensing model to support virtualisation (despite claims to the contrary from competitors).  The Microsoft virtual hard disk (.VHD) format is also available with a royalty-free license.
    • Infrastructure – new virtualisation technologies (such as Hyper-V) work with hardware support from Intel and AMD to allow agile virtualisation solutions that better utilise server resources.
    • Management – System Center Virtual Machine Manager helps customers to ease the process of virtualising their infrastructure and to better utilise the available resources, providing the same management tools for both virtual and physical machines.
    • Interoperability – working with both Citrix (XenSource) and Novell (SUSE Linux), Microsoft is able to support heterogeneity across the data centre).
    • Applications – in addition to virtualising server resources, Microsoft SoftGrid and Windows Server 2008 Terminal Services as technologies for application and presentation virtualisation.  Windows Server 2008 Terminal Services includes both Terminal Services Gateway and Terminal Services RemoteApp support.
  • your data {secure} – finally, security.  The days of insecure Microsoft operating systems are long since gone (in fact, Windows Server has always been pretty good) but new technologies in Windows Server 2008 include the server component of the network access protection (NAP) supported by Windows Vista for health validation and compliance checking, read-only domain controllers for secure delegated branch office deployment of Active Directory, fine grained password policies, and Active Directory rights management services for protecting documents during cross-organisational collaboration.

It’s also worth noting that Windows Server 2008 represents a turning point in the shift to 64-bit computing.  Unlike with desktop operating systems, where there is a vicious circle of vendors that won’t write 64-bit device drivers until there is proven demand and users who won’t adopt 64-bit technology until there is vendor support, in the x86/x64 server world there is broad support for 64-bit technologies and Windows Server is the last planned release of a 32-bit server operating system.

As an IT consultant, I agree with Microsoft that there is increasing pressure for IT departments to become more agile and return some benefit to the business – to reduce the cost of "keeping the lights on" and increase the organisation’s ability to innovate.  Microsoft thinks that Windows Server 2008 is more than just an operating system upgrade – that it is key to optimising the infrastructure – and I have to agree.  I was critical of Windows Vista when it was launched (actually, I was critical of the way that Microsoft left its XP customers waiting for a service pack… and we’re still waiting…) but I really can see advantages in the new technologies that Windows Server 2008 brings.  Will organisations deploy Windows Server 2008 right away?  I certainly hope so – there are many compelling reasons to use the new technology but, perhaps more significantly, the release of Windows Vista over a year previously has allowed many of the issues with the common technologies to be ironed out ahead of the server product release.

Finally, what’s with the curly braces smattered throughout this post?  Heroes happen {here} is the theme for the Microsoft marketing around the Windows Server 2008, Visual Studio 2008 and SQL Server 2008 joint product launch.  For those of us on this side of the pond, a UK launch site has also been released with press and customer events planned for 27 February and IT Professional events from 19 March onwards.   I’m also hoping to work with Scotty McLeod and Austin Osuide to step up the Windows Server Team events in 2008 and of course, watch this space for more detail on some of the technologies that I mentioned in this post.  In the meantime, check out Microsoft’s Windows Server 2008 Technical Overview.

Urgent client request

This content is 18 years old. I don't routinely update old blog posts as they are only intended to represent a view at a particular point in time. Please be warned that the information here may be out of date.

So here I am, last Friday before Christmas… trying to clear out my Inbox before the holidays and an urgent client request comes in…

We have received a late requirement for a virtualised global distribution system based on a traditional Linux Red Hat (with Red Nose) operating system utilising fat-client vertical drop-off delivery systems. The solution must be delivered by 24 December in order for the client to meet business deadlines and avoid massive disappointment to his customers.

The solution must be capable of scaling to meet global demand and have capacity to cater for worldwide overnight silent delivery.

Pull technology must be utilised using the open-source “Reindeer/Sleigh” principle and customer satisfaction is usually measured via the proprietary mince pie/brandy method. Alternative e-satisfaction measures have been tried but failed to satisfy the client.

Our client operates from a single site classified at top secret level using the latest encrypted/ virtualised addressing regime. I am allowed to tell you that the operating components (EL-VE-S) are highly resistant to frost.

Storage Area Network Technology Architecture (SAN-TA) is the essential core component.

Any design templates for a solution such as this from previous deployments (last December?) would be welcomed.

All those replying are guaranteed to have a great Christmas. The client has promised.

Happy Holidays

(Thanks to DT for letting me share this)

Migrating passwords with the Active Directory Migration Tool

This content is 18 years old. I don't routinely update old blog posts as they are only intended to represent a view at a particular point in time. Please be warned that the information here may be out of date.

I’ve spent most of this month working with a customer who is consolidating various Active Directory forests into a single domain. We didn’t use any third party tools – just the standard Microsoft utilities, i.e. Active Directory Migration Tool (ADMT) v3 and Exchange Migration Wizard (one of the Exchange Server 2003 deployment tools) – but they seem to do the job.

As migrating several hundred users to new accounts (with new passwords) would cause a huge number of support calls, I wanted to get the ADMT password migration DLL working. This took some time, but with the help of my enterprise support colleagues (effectively a PSS call), we found a way through. This is what was required:

(For reference, both the source and target domains were in Windows Server 2003 domain and forest functional mode, running Windows Server 2003 with a mixture of service packs 1 and 2.)

  1. Make sure that there is a trust in place between the source and target domains.
  2. Install ADMT by running admtsetup.exe and follow the installation wizard on the computer that will be used for the migration (I used a domain controller in the source domain but ideally you would have dedicated computers for migration activities and it seems logical that this should be in the target domain).
  3. If not already created by ADMT, create a new domain local group called domainname$$$. This group must be empty, and is required in order to migrate the sIDHistory information between source and target accounts.
  4. On the domain controller that will be used to export the account information (usually the DC holding the PDC Emulator operations master role for the source domain), create/set a value of 1 for a DWORD registry key called TcpipClientSupport in HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\System\CurrentControlSet\Control\LSA\.
  5. In both the source and target domains, ensure that success and failure auditing is enabled for account management.
  6. On a computer with ADMT installed, create a password encryption key for each source domain, by shelling out to a command prompt and entering the following commands:
    cd %systemroot%\ADMT
    admt key /option:create /sourcedomain:domainname /keyfile:filename.pes

    (the domainname can be specified in NetBIOS or DNS format.)
  7. On the domain controller in the source domain that holds the PDC Emulator operations master role, connect to the computer with ADMT installed (e.g. via the c$ administration share) and access the %systemroot%\ADMT\PES folder.
  8. Run pwdmig.exe to install the ADMT Password Migration DLL and follow the installation wizard. During the installation, supply the password encryption (.PES) file that was created earlier.
  9. This is the step that’s not in the instructions – even though the password encyption file was supplied during the installation of the ADMT Password Migration DLL, it still needs to be imported manually on the PDC Emulator, by shelling out to a command prompt and entering the following commands:
    cd %systemroot%\ADMT
    admt key /option:import /sourcedomain:domainname /keyfile:filename.pes
  10. On the domain controller that will be used to export the account information, create/set a value of 1 for a DWORD registry key called AllowPasswordExport in HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\System\CurrentControlSet\Control\LSA\. Note that this key constitutes a security risk and should only be enabled during the period of migration.
  11. Restart the computer with the ADMT Password Migrator DLL installed.
  12. Start the Password Export Server service.

Most of this is exactly as per the documentation – the main difference is the need to manually import the password encryption file. Without this, I was receiving the following message:

Error
Unable to establish a session with the password export server. The source password export server and the target server do not have the same encryption key for the source domain.

Finally, what permissions are required? I used Local System for the Password Export Server service. For everything else, I used an account which had been created in both forests with identical passwords and which was a member of the Domain Admins group. That’s a little excessive, and best practice would involve using an account with the minimum required permissions. Basically, an account is required that is:

  • Domain administrator in the source domain.
  • Local administrator on the computer on which ADMT is installed.
  • Delegated permissions on OUs that are targets for resource migration in the target domain, including the extended right to Migrate SID History (visible in the Security for an object using the Advanced Features view in Active Directory Users and Computers).

Further advice can be found in the ADMT v3 Migration Guide.

What happened to not being evil…

This content is 18 years old. I don't routinely update old blog posts as they are only intended to represent a view at a particular point in time. Please be warned that the information here may be out of date.

A few weeks back, I saw the number of browser visits to this site drop dramatically overnight whilst RSS subscriptions remained constant. Thankfully, traffic is now back up to the previous levels and there could be many reasons for this but I have to suspect it’s down to Google’s latest round of cat and mouse with the SEOs.

Webstats for the last few weeks, showing a sharp dip and return to normal and last year's numbers for comparison.

markwilson.it is not a big-shot technology website – just the blog of a guy who works in IT, writes down what he learns, and publishes it for others to read. I don’t charge for that content, largely because I don’t think anyone would pay for it but also because I don’t think that to do so would fit with the spirit of the Internet. I like it when I meet people that read my blog. And I like it when I write something and someone gives something back, like a comment that says it helped them, or that they have something to add to the story. I like it when I find myself in conversation with the public relations agencies of some of the world’s largest IT companies. I also like that the advertising revenues, though still small, have been enough to cover my hosting costs and maybe buy me the odd gadget. Or at least they did until Google made its latest round of changes.

Google is trying to penalise paid links and, at the time of writing, I have a few (clearly marked under the heading of sponsors). There’s nothing wrong with what Google is doing (trying to increase the quality of the results in its index) but it’s the way they do it. I sell advertising here because I need to (somehow) monetise this site (although if I convert that into an hourly wage rate, I’m sure it will make me cry). Ironically, it seems to be OK to carry Google’s paid ads but not anybody else’s – even if they are relevant.

Prominent Google blogger, Matt Cutts, said (in 2005) that:

“Reputable sites that sell links won’t have their search engine rankings or PageRank penalized […] However, link-selling sites can lose their ability to give reputation (e.g. PageRank and anchortext).”

That’s fair enough. It seems that I can take some revenue from selling links but it won’t help the sites that I link to gain PageRank; however, if the paid links are relevant, there is a chance that people reading my site will click through to them and everyone’s a winner. Except that now that seems to have changed and selling links can hurt Google rankings. For what it’s worth, I have a disclosure notice and the advertising, sponsorship and other forms of compensation received do not influence the editorial content on this site. I also use rel="nofollow" tags where relevant to ensure that I follow Google’s directions (although I acknowledge the contribution that comments make to the blogosphere by removing the rel="nofollow" as appropriate). And after two months of tweaking links to fit Google’s model, this week my biggest sponsor ended our contract prematurely because they are dropping this form of advertising altogether.

Thanks for nothing Google. Cutts may be right when he asserts that:

“[…] Google has the right to do whatever we think is best (in our index, algorithms, or scoring) to return relevant results.”

but now they are hitting the small guys too. I can’t rely on AdSense alone. It varies too wildly (and has been declining in recent months, suggesting to me that people are spending less on Internet advertising – probably a reflection on the state of various western economies) and now you’ve started to hit the only form of regular income that this site has. What happened to the “don’t be evil” corporate motto?

I will continue to blog about things I find interesting. Maybe some other people will find it interesting too. Perhaps they will link back here and maybe the number of visitors will start to climb again as I gradually increase my placement in the Google index (however I look at things, I’m still 34.95% up on unique visits so far this month, compared to the same period last year, 47.71% up in pageviews with average pageviews and time on site also on the up, and a falling bouncerate – so the metrics all look good, it’s just the financials that are suffering). Until then, I guess I won’t be buying the MacBook Pro that I’ve had my eye on for so long.

Why I will be remastering my childrens’ DVDs

This content is 18 years old. I don't routinely update old blog posts as they are only intended to represent a view at a particular point in time. Please be warned that the information here may be out of date.

There’s been much discussion of the UK’s archaic copyright laws as I’ve questioned the need for DRM and written about ripping DVDs and converting between multimedia formats. I’ve also criticised the BBC for it’s substandard iPlayer service (even if it does now stream content it still doesn’t allow offline playback on all platforms and, when it does, the DRM on the offline content is overly-restrictive). Well, here’s another example of DRM madness brought to me by the BBC – this time it’s a menu system on a legally purchased DVD.

My children don’t watch a lot of television, but there is one programme, In The Night Garden…, that is almost guaranteed to attract my three-year-old’s attention for a full 30 minutes (believe me, that is an achievement) and also provides a fair amount of delight for my one-year-old (I have to confess that I enjoy it too). It’s a very gentle programme, perfect for a spot of post-lunchtime relaxation, or for winding down before stories and bed. So, there we were, trying to calm down an overtired and slightly poorly little boy who was desperate to see Igglepiggle in the Night Garden and who doesn’t understand the idea of a TV schedule, when we decided that the DVD we had bought the boys for Christmas would be better used right away (and at least give us the chance to prepare a meal for the little people before a sleep).

On went the TV and the DVD player, in went the disc, I pressed the play button and was greeted with 2 and a quarter minutes of loud, high energy trailers for other childrens’ programming from the BBC. I tried to skip the trailers and to go straight to the menu but all attempts were greeted with a message that said “operation currently prohibited by the disc”. Now I can understand making me watch the legal notices, but forcing me to watch the trailers (on a DVD intended for children) is wrong. So I will be ripping the programmes from that DVD and re-recording them to disc without the menus, trailers, or anything else. In effect, BBC Worldwide is forcing me to break the copyright on a DVD that I have legally purchased – just to avoid the advertising.

I would complain to BBC Worldwide, but they only publish a postal address (no e-mail) for contact, so I can’t be bothered. And writing to Points of View won’t help either! In the meantime, I’ll leave my complaint on the Internet for any other prospective childrens’ DVD purchasers to consider…

Not blown away as Altec Lansing goes into orbit

This content is 18 years old. I don't routinely update old blog posts as they are only intended to represent a view at a particular point in time. Please be warned that the information here may be out of date.

Just over a year ago, I bought an iPod speaker system from Altec Lansing. Easily as good as the Apple equivalent (and at less than half the price), I’ve been really pleased with them, so when Altec Lansing‘s public relations team got in touch and asked if I’d be interested in a new portable speaker for review, I was pleased.

Unfortunately, my pleasure didn’t last too long once I received the speaker (yes, singular). You see, I’m now in the second half of my thirties… closer to 40 than to 30 and I have two kids, so I guess I’m entitled to be a grumpy old man. I find it offensive when people (generally teenagers) walk around playing their music on their phones or other portable devices through poor quality, low powered speakers and can’t help thinking that at least in my day I had a “ghettoblaster” the size of a large piece of luggage to annoy people with my idea of good music (I won’t embarrass myself by divulging any further details…). What’s that got to do with the iM207 speaker (also known as the Orbit) that Altec Lansing sent me? Well, quite a lot as it happens as I’ve had my Orbit for a couple of weeks now and I have been trying to think of something good to write about it:

  • I could say that the Orbit is small. But it’s not really – just look at the picture of one next to a standard iPod.
  • Product shot of Altec Lansing Orbit portable speaker

  • I could say that the Orbit looks good. But it doesn’t. I’m sorry but I just don’t find black and chrome-effect plastic very attractive (although, now I come to think of it, that’s what the iPod uses…).
  • What about battery life? To be honest, I don’t know (Altec Lansing claim 24 hours on three triple-As) and anyway, that will vary according to a number of factors including the battery brand and characteristics, as well as the type and volume of music being played.
  • What about sound quality – surely that’s the most important thing? Yes, it is, but my iPhone’s internal speakers are better and when I plug the Orbit into my iPod I can only listen at up to about 25% volume before the distortion starts to kick in.
  • I could say that the Orbit is inexpensive. But I think £29.99 is a lot for something that’s not really very good. £14.99 would be a different story.
  • The best thing I can say about the Orbit is that the cable storage is well thought through and it’s iPhone friendly. There’s also a 2.5mm converter for use with mobile phones that don’t have a 3.5mm headphone jack.
  • There is one more thing too… you can get an Orbit for free – and hey, maybe you’ll like it better than I did. Just go to the YouGroove site and sign up.

So, I’m sorry Altec Lansing… you asked for a fair review and I really tried but the Orbit just doesn’t do it for me. Maybe I’m just not in that target “YouGroover” audience and I like my music to either be personal (i.e. in-ear) or to be played through a decent speaker system.

Dara Ó Briain talks about IT

This content is 18 years old. I don't routinely update old blog posts as they are only intended to represent a view at a particular point in time. Please be warned that the information here may be out of date.

So there I was, lying in bed in my hotel room, when Dara Ó Briain comes on the telly and starts talking about IT… it made me laugh a lot. So much that I thought I’d reproduce it here:

“[IT is] full of amazing bullshit job titles that didn’t exist 10, 20 years ago. You’re a developer for Christ sake eh! Do you have a web master in the office? [Yes] Of course you do. Yeah. Web master is my favourite of all of those – walking around the office going ‘I Am A Web Master. I Am Master Of The Web. Feel The Power Of My Fire Wall. It is not actually a wall of fire, no it is more of a protocol for e-mails, anyway, nevermind – I Am A Web Master. I am not social situation master – no I can’t do that at all no. I am not talking to women master – no there are too many variables in that situation as well I can’t be handling that’.

That, and my favourite thing about your industry by the way is ‘solutions’. You do love the solutions don’t ya? You know, when your computer’s not working and you’re kinda going, ‘ah, it’s not working, get the guy’ and one of your people arrives, in a cape, going ‘I, am a Solution Provider. You, you’re a problem provider, back away problem provider – you would not understand my solution, it is too technical for you, get out, get out of the room. Do not look at the computer – your eyes hurt the computer – get out! Have they gone? Lovely. Control – Alt – Delete…'”

[Dara Ó Briain, Comedian]