Imagine the situation: you’re just stepping out onto a Zebra crossing (you have right of way) and you see a seven-and-a-half-ton truck, 10 or 20 metres away, still moving at around 30mph with the driver looking down as if he is reading a newspaper, a text message on his phone, or something similar; you shout a warning (“Oy!”) and step back, slapping your hand on the side of the truck as it drives past but it continues its journey, as if nothing had happened.

That’s what happened to me this morning and it made me angry. I’ve spent enough years driving cars (and developing a sixth sense when I was a motorcyclist) to watch out for things like this, but imagine if I had been an elderly person crossing the road, or a child. I wouldn’t be here to tell the tale.

A few seconds later, the truck stopped at a set of traffic lights so I ran down the road and challenged the driver. I may have used a few choice words (I almost certainly did) but he denied that I was on the crossing as he approached (how would he know – he wasn’t even looking ahead!). Standing in front of the truck, I got my phone out to take a picture of the registration plate and the driver actually drove the truck at me as if to push me out of the way! There was no way he would deliberately run me over but he jumped out of his cab and grabbed my phone, telling me he would give it back (throw it under the truck more like) when I moved. For the next few minutes he refused to give it back to me, driving the truck at me once more as I protested to get my phone back. At one point he got out of the cab again and grabbed me by my jacket collar to move me out of the way (I’m seventeen and a half stone – but he was taller than me, stronger than me, and bloody annoyed with me). Eventually, after calming down and noticing I was shaking (showing some humility at least) the truck driver returned my mobile phone and we agreed that we would go our separate ways. I was still shaking, and I didn’t manage to record the registration number of the truck but it belongs to Biffa, a waste management and recycling company, and I’m sure they will be able to track it, should they so desire…

Throughout the incident, which probably lasted at least five minutes and was right outside a busy London railway station, during the rush hour, people stood and watched. Some took pictures with their mobile phones but no-one called the police when I called out and asked them to, on at least two occasions. I may have been stupid to pick an argument with someone who was prepared to drive a lorry at me but really, London commuters, are you really that self-absorbed that you won’t help someone out after seeing them being subjected to threatening behaviour bordering on physical assault?  Even if you didn’t want to “get involved”, you could have asked me if I was alright after the truck was driven away.

After travelling a couple of stops on the tube, I saw some British Transport Police officers and I asked for advice. The officer I spoke to was very helpful, including giving me the number for the Metropolitan Police but, I honestly think that reporting the incident will be a waste of my time and theirs. I have no evidence (only a blurred, shaky camera phone picture of the truck driving away, in which there are no identifiable markings) and, despite the city being littered with CCTV, the police have much bigger priorities.

Looking back, with slightly less adrenalin being pumped around my system, I can see it was not wise to put myself in a dangerous position but there is no excuse for deliberately driving a lorry at me. I’m sure the driver is a decent guy, just as pumped up by the situation as I was but, more to the point, if Biffa’s operatives are driving without due care and attention, the next person to cross the road in front of them might not be so lucky. As one of my (female – i.e. not testosterone-fuelled) colleagues observed, hopefully the incident will make this truck driver think more carefully about his actions, even if he won’t openly admit that he made a mistake. And I should be grateful that the worst thing to come out of this for me, was needing to replace my damaged iPhone headphones.

Last night, as is normal on a Sunday evening in my house, I had a relaxing evening watching BBC Top Gear. During the news section, Jeremy Clarkson smashed up an extremely annoying device with a light-sensor to detect when a car’s fuel filler cap is opened and warn you to use only diesel fuel.

I thought it was funny and that no-one would actually buy one, until this morning I received one in the post from the lease company that owns my company car along with a letter mandating that I fit it to the car and warning that I will be personally liable for any damage caused by any future misfuelling (I have, of course, told them that I will install the thing but have refused to comply with the liability part).

I understand why they are doing this – the AA motoring trust has produced a report which details the problem along with some interesting statistics about misfuelling call-outs. I also admit that I did previously (many years ago) accidentally put half a tank of petrol into a diesel car as well as nearly filling the tank of this car with petrol when it was new (on both occasions, I had been using a petrol car for the previous few weeks), but the lease company waited 6 weeks to send this to me and I definitely know to use diesel now!

Misfuelling may be expensive and embarrassing, but this thing is a) loud b) American c) tacky d) noise-polluting e) extremely embarrassing! If you don’t believe me, then listen to how it sounds yourself.

Add to that, I’ve had to fit this horrible thing to a car about which Clarkson wrote:

“You’ve deliberately gone your own way, deliberately bought something that isn’t a BMW or a Merc or an Audi. And in the process you’ve ended up with something that’s not only a little bit different, but also rather good.”

[Jeremy Clarkson, Sunday Times, 13 November 2005]

I’m dreading my next visit to a filling station forecourt. As my wife said, at least it will be a talking point – let’s see if she still thinks that as she cowers down in the passenger seat pretending she’s not there.

Earlier this afternoon, as I drove home in the dark across Buckinghamshire, Oxfordshire and Northamptonshire, it struck me just how many satellite navigation systems people are fitted in cars today (at least, I assume they were sat-nav devices, and that people were not just watching TV!). I don’t have sat-nav for two (three) reasons – I have a map book, I have a very good memory for remembering routes (and I was too tight to specify another £1200 options last time I ordered a car); however I do acknowledge that not everyone is a comfortable with their route planning capabilities and everyone I know with a Tom Tom raves about it.

My car tells me when I, or one of my passengers, isn’t wearing a seatbelt. It also turns on the wipers when the windscreen is wet. So, in general, I would say that applying technology to increase driver comfort and safety is a good thing.

It’s sad though, that technology hasn’t been used to detect when a driver needs to use their lights, or when there is a fault with a vehicle and it is unsafe to drive. On the same journey, the first hour of it was spent driving in fog (although visibility was still about 400 metres) – that meant that there was a mixture of people driving without lights (!) and people who thought they needed to use their rear fog lights even though I was right behind them and perfectly aware of their presence.

A few months back I had a rant about the replacement of real police by cameras in the name of road safety – my point being that a traffic policeman can exercise judgement over an issue that’s much broader than simply speeding, whereas a camera can’t. At the same time, I’ve seen a rise in unchecked vehicle defects. A few weeks back I followed a car for several miles which was belching out black noxious fumes. Today, I followed a car with only one working brake light which was directly above the rear fog light that was dazzling me. Later, a 7.5 tonne truck pulled out in front of me to overtake someone, and I saw the indicators on the side of the cab, but narrowly avoided a collision as his rear indicators didn’t work and it was all a bit too late.

Instead of all these gadgets, please can someone apply technology (or even people) to road safety – and I don’t just mean the politically correct issue of excess speed.